[FULL STORY] My Fiancée Announced 'I'm Done Listening To Your 'Feelings' And 'Needs ' You're Too

We were supposed to discuss the wedding budget. Her parents were covering the venue and catering. $22,000 total. We were supposed to split the bar tab, photographer, and DJ. Came out to about $6,800 each. I'd mentioned maybe we should look at our finances together before committing.

She slammed her water glass down. Oh my god, not this again. I just think we should No, I'm done. I'm done listening to your feelings and needs. You're too emotional for a man. Do you know how exhausting it is? Every single decision requires a discussion. My dad never acted like this. He just handled things and let my mom plan. I'm not your dad. Clearly, he's actually masculine. Stood there holding a spatula. Pasta was burning.

You want me to stop sharing my feelings? I want you to stop having so many feelings or at least keep them to yourself. I can't be your therapist. Noted. Don't be dramatic. Turned off the stove. Lost my appetite. That night, I decided she didn't want to hear my feelings. She'd hear nothing at all. Next morning at 9:23 a.m. LinkedIn message, recruiter, senior software architect position, different state, 850 mi away. 105K salary increase plus $12 signing bonus and full relocation package. Would normally show her discuss it together. Not this time. Responded extremely interested.

When can we talk? Phone screen at 2 p.m. Nailed it. Second interview Friday. Came home. She was on her phone. How was work? Fine. You're being weird. Just tired. Panel interview Friday. Six people, 2 hours. Crushed it. They said they'd have an offer by Monday. Didn't tell her about any of it. Offer came Monday at 11:08 a.m. Signed it at 11:34 a.m. Start date in 6 weeks. Apartment hunting started that night. Found a place in 3 days. Onebedroom, nice building, one 680 month. Signed the lease. First, last security $5,40 total. Move-in date, five weeks. Our current lease ended in seven weeks. My name only. I'd signed it before we moved in together. Perfect timing.

Gave 2 weeks notice at work Wednesday. Boss was disappointed but understood. Started decluttering. Sold stuff online. My fianceé loved it. See, this is what I've been saying. You had so much junk. Sure. Rented a storage unit 2 weeks out. $165 per month. started moving things there on Saturdays. Told her I was donating it all. Week four, her mom called about final wedding details. We need your guest list by next week. Better ask her about that. Is everything okay? You sound off. Just busy. Well, we're very excited. Only 5 months away, right? Week five. Booked the moving truck. 20-footer from a local company. $950 with insurance. scheduled for Friday at 9:00 a.m. My fianceé had mentioned weeks ago she'd be working from home all day Friday, backtoback video meetings until at least 3:00 p.m. Even better, she'd be home to watch.

Thursday night, I barely slept. Not nervous, excited. She woke up Friday at 8:00 a.m. Made coffee, sat down at her laptop in the living room. Big meeting day. Don't make noise, okay? Won't be a problem. 8:47 a.m. My phone buzzed. Movers were 10 minutes out. 8:58 a.m. The truck pulled up. Update one. She was on a video call when the doorbell rang. Can you get that? She whispered, yelled. Camera off. Open the door. Three guys with dollies. Here for the move. Yep. Let's do this. Started directing them.

My furniture, my boxes, my electronics, my fiance's head whipped around. Held up a finger. Wait one minute. Turned her camera back on, smiling. Sorry about that. Let me share my screen. The movers kept working. First trip out my couch. She looked over, looked at me, looked at the movers, mouthed. What's happening? Pointed to my phone, texted her. Moving. Stay on your call. Her eyes went huge. Tried to say something, but her boss was talking. She unmuted. Yes, I agree with that approach. Voice shaking. Second trip. My TV, my desk, my bookshelf. She texted back. What do you mean moving? 

Exactly what it sounds like. Where? Different state. New job starting Monday. Her camera was still on, watched her face go from confused to panicked to furious, but she couldn't say anything. Her entire team was on this call. She typed, "You can't just leave. We're getting married. You said you were done listening to my feelings, so I stopped sharing them, including the job offer. This is insane. Got to go. Movers need help." She stood up, forgot her camera was on, walked toward me. "I'm in a meeting," someone shouted through her laptop speakers. She froze, turned around, sat back down, camera back on. Sorry, technical difficulties. The movers worked for 3 hours.

Everything I owned went into that truck. About 65% of the apartment's contents. She stayed on video calls the entire time. Watched helplessly as her home was dismantled. Kept muting and unmuting, asking me what was happening between calls. I already told you you can't do this. I'm doing it. We're supposed to get married in 5 months. Not anymore. My parents spent $22,000. Your parents? Not me. I never agreed to pay for anything. 11:52 a.m.

The movers finished loading. Walked over to where she was sitting. She was on another call. Camera off this time. Placed my tea and garage remote on the table in front of her. Lease ends in 2 weeks. You're not on it. Figure it out. Her mouth opened. Nothing came out. Walked out. Closed the door. Got in my car. followed the truck.

My phone started ringing at 12:14 p.m. Her call had ended. Ignored it. By the time I stopped for gas an hour later, I had 18 missed calls and 32 texts. Read through them at the gas station. Answer your phone. You can't do this to me. Where are you going? What state? I'm calling the police. This is kidnapping. Of what? My own furniture. My mom is freaking out. Everyone is asking where you are. Answer me. I'll cancel the wedding. You're leaving me with nothing.

The apartment is empty. You're a psychopath. I called your mom. She doesn't know anything. Where are you? Turned off my phone. Drove the remaining 6 hours in peace. Arrived at my new apartment at 7:23 p.m. Movers unloaded. Tipped them $200 total. They left by 900 p.m. Ordered Chinese food. Sat on my couch. Turned my phone back on. 63 missed calls. Over a 100red texts. 12 voicemails. The voicemails escalated beautifully. VM1, what the hell is going on? Call me back right now. VM3, the landlord said the lease ends in 2 weeks and only your name is on it.

What am I supposed to do? VM6, my mom is crying. Do you know what you've done? We have to cancel everything. Fine. Fine. If you want to throw away 3 years, go ahead. But you're paying for half this wedding. My parents are getting a lawyer. I know you're seeing this. I know you're ignoring me. You're a coward. You're pathetic. Everyone is going to know what you did. Texted her once. You told me you were done listening to my feelings and needs.

I took you seriously. Stopped sharing everything, including the job offer, the apartment, and the move. The lease ends in 2 weeks. Only my name on it. Handle it however you want. Don't contact me again. Blocked her number, blocked her family, went to bed. Saturday morning, first day exploring my new city. Felt amazing. Checked my email over breakfast. 26 emails. Her, her mom, her sister, her dad, her best friend, two of her cousins, her mom's. You have humiliated our family.

Do you know what it's like to call 180 people and cancel a wedding? Do you know how much money we've lost? $22,000. $22,000. You will be hearing from our attorney. What you did is illegal. You can't just abandon someone you're engaged to. We will sue you for every penny. Replied. I never signed a contract for the wedding. Never contributed financially. You planned it without my input because your daughter said she didn't want to hear my feelings. Sue me if you want.

You'll lose. Her dad's email was shorter. I raised my daughter to be strong. Maybe too strong. But what you did leaving without a word? That's not what men do. Men communicate. Men work through problems. Call me. Didn't respond. Blocked them all. Sunday afternoon. Knock on my door. Looked through the peepphole. My ex- fiance, her sister, her mom. How did they find me? Open the door with the chain on. How did you get this address? Your mother gave it to me. My ex shrieked. After I told her you abandoned me. Note to self. Have a talk with mom.

You need to leave. We drove 9 hours to talk to you. I said, "Don't contact me." Her mom pushed forward. "You owe us an explanation. You owe us money. We spent thousands. You spent thousands on a wedding I never agreed to pay for. Your daughter told me she didn't want my input." She got her wish. "You're twisting everything." Her sister yelled. She had one bad day and you blew up your entire life. "Actually, she had multiple bad days where she told me I was too emotional and she was tired of hearing my feelings, so I stopped sharing them. One comment. My ex screamed.

You're doing all this over one comment. The comment that ended it. Yeah. The breaking point of many comments. Her mom was crying now. We can't get the deposits back. Do you understand? $22,000 is just gone. We're not rich people. Then maybe don't plan an expensive wedding without making sure both people want it. You proposed. My ex shrieked. I did 9 months ago before you spent months telling me my feelings were a burden. Security showed up. Must have been called by a neighbor. Everything okay here? These people are harassing me.

I've asked them to leave. You heard him. Time to go. You can't kick us out. We drove 9 hours. Her sister protested. Ma'am, this is private property. Leave or I call the police. They left screaming the whole way to their car about lawyers and revenge and karma. I watched from my window as they sat in the car for 20 minutes arguing, crying. Finally drove away. Started my new job Monday. It was great. Update two. Week one at the job. My ex found my work email. Sent me a novel Tuesday morning. Subject: Please read this. Didn't read it. Forwarded to HR. My ex- fiance is harassing me.

I left her after she told me she was done listening to my feelings. She's not handling it well. HR called her and told her to stop where they'd pursue legal action. She stopped emailing work, got served with papers Thursday. At my new apartment, she was actually suing me. The claim, breach of promise to marry and unjust enrichment. She wanted $11,000, half the wedding deposits. Took it to a lawyer Friday. Consultation was $300. He read it, started laughing. Breach of promise to marry isn't recognized in this state. And even in states that recognize it, you'd need proof of financial loss caused by you.

She has none. You didn't pay for anything. So this goes nowhere. Nowhere fast. I'll respond for $700. Basically telling her she has no case and further frivolous litigation will result in me pursuing legal fees from her. Do it. He sent the response. Two weeks later, her lawsuit was dropped, but the harassment intensified. She created a fake email account. Jennifer Stone 2024 and sent me paragraphs. I hope you're happy.

I hope your new life is worth destroying mine. I had to move back in with my parents. Back in with my parents at 29 years old because you took everything. You took the apartment. You took my stability. You took my future. Everyone at work keeps asking about the wedding. Do you know how humiliating it is? Some people thought I was lying about being engaged. That's how sudden it was. You didn't just leave me. You humiliated me. Blocked the email.

She made another Emily cares 888. My therapist says you're a narcissist. She says what you did is called stonewalling and it's abuse. You abused me by refusing to communicate. You abused me by leaving without warning. I'm in therapy because of you. I'm on anxiety medication because of you. But sure, go live your best life while I pick up the pieces. Blocked that, too. Her best friend dememed me on Instagram.

I'd made a new account, kept it private. She must have found it somehow. You're disgusting. Do you know she cries every day? She can't eat. She can't sleep. She's a shell of herself. And you don't even care. You just moved on like she meant nothing. Three years together and you threw her away like garbage. I hope karma gets you blocked. Week three. Her dad showed up at my apartment building. Didn't have my unit number, but was calling my name in the lobby. We need to talk manto man. Security called me. I came down. Sir, I've asked you multiple times not to come here.

I drove 9 hours again. The least you can do is hear me out. I don't owe you anything. Leave or I'm calling the police. My daughter is destroyed. Destroyed. You didn't just break up with her. You humiliated her. You left her with an empty apartment and two weeks to find a new place. She had to beg us for money. She's 29 and living at home because of you. She's 29 and living at home because she spent 3 years telling me my feelings didn't matter. Actions have consequences. You could have talked to her, worked it out, but you ran away like a child.

I tried talking multiple times. She shut me down every time. Said I was too emotional, so I stopped talking. One argument, not one argument, multiple. Over months, she made it clear she didn't want to hear from me, so I gave her what she wanted. Security step between us. Sir, time to go. He left, but not before shouting. You're going to regret this. You're going to end up alone and miserable, and you'll realize what you lost. Maybe or maybe not. Week four. Got a call from the wedding venue. They were confused. We have your fiance claiming you agreed to split the cost of the venue, and she wants us to pursue you for half the deposit.

I never signed anything with you. Never paid you a deposit. Check your records. We have her mother's credit card and her signature, not yours. Then the debt is between you and them. I have no contract with you. She's claiming you verbally agreed. Verbal agreements aren't enforceable for this amount in this state. Talk to your lawyer if you don't believe me. They dropped it, but her mom sent me a certified letter. You are a thief. You are a liar. You are destroying our family. We will not stop until you pay us what you owe. We've contacted a lawyer. We've contacted the police. We've contacted everyone who knows you to tell them what kind of person you are.

You will not get away with this. Showed it to my lawyer. He sent them a cease and desist. $400 for that. If they contacted me again, we could pursue harassment charges. They stopped. Month two, my ex found out where I worked. Not from me. Someone must have told her. Started calling the main office line. reception kept telling her, "I'd asked not to be contacted." She called anyway, "Five times in one week. HR got involved. Your ex- fiance has been calling repeatedly.

We need to address this. I've blocked her everywhere. Told her not to contact me. She won't stop. We're going to send her a formal cease and desist from our legal team. If she contacts this office again, we'll pursue legal action." They sent it. She stopped calling, but she didn't stop trying. got a LinkedIn message from her. She'd paid for premium just to message me. I know you hate me. I know you think I'm crazy. Maybe I am, but I miss you. I miss us. I'm sorry for what I said. I was stressed and I took it out on you. Can we please talk just once? I promise I'll leave you alone after.

I just need closure. Didn't respond. She sent eight more messages over the next week. Each more desperate. Finally replied, "You told me you were done listening to my feelings. I took you seriously. There's nothing to talk about. Move on. Blocked her on LinkedIn. Update three. Month three. Her best friend called my workline. Got through somehow. She's not eating. Did you know that she's lost 20 lb? She's so depressed she can barely get out of bed.

Are you happy? Is this what you wanted? I wanted her to listen when I tried to communicate. She refused, so I left. Her mental health isn't my responsibility anymore. You don't just abandon someone you love. I abandoned someone who told me my feelings were a burden. Big difference. She was having a bad day for 3 months. She was having a bad day for 3 months straight. Silence. That's what I thought. Hung up. Reported the call to HR. They blocked that number. Got an email from her mom's lawyer.

Third one now. More threats about lawsuits. More claims about verbal agreements. More demands for money. My lawyer responded, "Your client has filed and dropped one frivolous lawsuit already. Any further legal threats will result in countersuit for harassment. All claims have been proven baseless. Cease contact immediately." Never heard from that lawyer again either. Month four, mutual friend reached out. Guy I'd known for years before I even met my ex. Dude, she's telling everyone you ghosted her with no warning.

That you were fine one day and gone the next. Is that true? No, she told me repeatedly she was done listening to my feelings, that I was too emotional for a man, so I stopped telling her things, including that I got a new job and was moving. Holy she's not mentioning that part. Of course not. What's she saying? That you left her high and dry, took everything from the apartment, left her homeless and broke. That you're refusing to pay her back for the wedding. I never agreed to pay for the wedding. Her parents paid.

I was never asked to contribute. The apartment lease was in my name only. She was never on it. She had two weeks to figure it out. And I didn't leave her broke. She had her own income and savings. Man, the story she's telling is way different. People who get left usually rewrite history to make themselves the victim. Fair point. You doing okay, though? Better than okay. Best decision I ever made. Got a final certified letter from her dad. Week 17. expected more threats, more demands. Instead, I owe you an apology.

Last week, I found some text messages on my daughter's old phone. Messages between her and her mother about the wedding planning. She said some things about you that I never knew. Called you overly sensitive and exhausting to deal with. Said she was training you to be less needy. I confronted her. She admitted she said those things you told me about about being done. Listen to your feelings. I'm ashamed of her and I'm sorry I blamed you. You did what you had to do. Good luck with your new life. Put that letter in a drawer. Didn't respond but didn't throw it away.

My ex sent one final email last week, month six, postb breakup. Subject: I understand now. I've been in therapy for 4 months. My therapist helped me see what I did, how I treated you, how I made you feel like your feelings didn't matter. She's right. I was wrong. I was controlling. I was dismissive. I damaged you and I'm sorry. I don't expect you to forgive me. I don't expect you to respond. I just wanted you to know that I get it now.

I understand why you left and I'm sorry I made you feel like you had to leave that way. I hope you're happy. Truly take care of yourself. Read it three times. Felt nothing. Not anger, not satisfaction, just nothing. Didn't respond. Closed the email. Moved on with my day. As for me, life's pretty great. New job gave me another raise. Performance bonus plus cost of living adjustment. Dating someone casually.

She's a teacher. Smart, funny, empathetic. Actually asks about my day and listens to the answer. Novel concept. My apartment feels like home now. Got new furniture. Made it mine. Have friends here. Life I actually enjoy. And I share my feelings when I have them with people who actually want to hear them.

My ex wanted a man who didn't have needs, who just handled things silently, who kept his feelings to himself. She got exactly that for 6 weeks while I planned my exit. Then she got nothing at all. Sometimes the best revenge is giving people exactly what they ask for, then leaving.